My little perfectionist

Well, my 5 year old William had his checkup this past week. Physically he is perfect. He is hardly ever sick. Developmentally...I guess something is just not right. I was told that he probably has some form of autism as well as sensory integration disorder!! Well, I knew something just wasn't right since he was about 2 when he did not have any language development but now that he is older the doctors can see that it may be more than that. The fact that he is deathly afraid of the bathtub, lines up his toys in matching pairs and by color and size, doesn't sleep more than 6 hours a day, can only have a conversation about television, books or legos, memorizes TV commercials, conversations and cartoon episodes, and all the other things I can not think of right now. I was hoping I would only have 1 special needs child to deal with. I am quickly increasing that number. He has his full developmental evaluation in June so I guess we will find out for sure then.

Up until now his odd behavior has been disruptive but manageable. His homeschooling has been going ok...he is highly verbal and memorizes spoken words with autographic perfection. Most of his schooling has been verbal up until now. He desperately wants to write words and do addition, which he does fine with the computer when he has to recognize things. This week we started on writing. He can write his name which took him a very long time to learn and he still writes it backwards. We started practicing how to write numbers and letters this week since he has been driving me crazy about doing math (he is obsessed with numbers...counts EVERYTHING! and he loves spanish...he is the only spanish speaking white kid on the playgrounds..=).

I do not think he is ready to write. I wrote the numbers out and had him practice. He could not do it PERFECT and it lead to a serious meltdown. I look over and he has paper strewn everywhere...he got a new sheet everytime he messed up one number and had worn down 2 erasers in a matter of minutes. I am now getting afraid of what the rest of his schooling may bring. If things are not perfect it is like the world has ended. Well...I will learn. I think alot of his education will have to focus on spoken instruction, but he will have to write at some point.

Slow and steady wins the race...isn't that what the turtle says...William like turtles...he is kind of like a turtle sometimes I guess (last one to get dressed, last one to finish eating, last one in the car, last one to get buckled), except when it comes to writing. I guess we will have to talk about turtles. I know God will help us find a way...just like he always has before.

Thank you God for giving me my extra-special son=)

Signs of life!

It has been unseasonably warm here in southeastern Virginia...72 today, 81 tomorrow!! I have been longing for spring and today when passing by the local nursery I noticed some of their white dogwoods are in BLOOM!! I am so excited. I know we will have a dreadful cold spell before spring is really here, but I am giddy about the coming warmer weather...we can actually go outside and have picnics now and grill out again. Warm weather is so much more appreciated when you have several children who get stuck staying inside in the winter and driving their mother INSANE.

There is always a catch however...with the approaching spring I have to remind myself that a Virginia summer is right behind and it can get so HOT here in the summer. With summer comes relapses of my 'illness' that are brought on by heat. This...I do not get excited about.

Oh well, spring is on the way and that is ALWAYS a good thing (as Martha would say).

Disappointment

The last several days I have been doing some surfing on the internet, looking at some homeschooling material and researching some medical information, and I have come across several websites and blogs...mostly by homeschoolers, or people with large families, religious womens sites etc...about how to be a good wife, good homemaker, good homeschooler, good mother etc. Many of them talk about being thrifty and making healthy meals from scratch and buying food from local farmers, or putting together free materials in order to homeschool or how to keep your house spottless or keep up with the laundary...tips on how to stretch a penny and the best way to discipline...oh I could go on and on.

Sometimes I feel like I am the only christian person who lets my kids watch TV and eat fast food. Between making sure my children get the BEST education I can provide, making sure they each have clothes that not only fit them but are CLEAN, and making sure that they have activities that do not involve just me and their siblings or a church group (since I do believe that children should not grow up in a bubble of christianity) I can not keep up. Between soccer, baseball, cheerleading, church activities, homeschooling, taking care of 2 toddlers, dealing with doctors appointments, therapy appoinments and anything else that happens to come up...how am I supposed to make my own bread, make 3 homeade meals a day that are portable, clip coupons, make my own cleaning products, loose weight, grow my own vegatables, scour the planet for vegetarian meal recipies, keep up with my email, raise chickens for eggs, make my own butter, wash my clothes by hand...OK so no-one has exactly told me I should make my own butter, but all the others are suggestions I have gotten or have seen made...

I just do not see how some people do what they do. Don't get me wrong...I do not think that kids should watch tv all day and eat at McDonald's every night, but sometimes TV and fast food do have a place. I do not think that technology should raise our kids and I think there are more important things than cheerleading practice.

What I am trying to say is I try to keep a balance. No my kids are probably not the healthiest kids in the world, nor are they the smartest or the most well versed in the Bible. I know for a fact there are many areas that need improvement but why do I feel like this is what christian-homeschoolers especially are pushing? Why is it important that we raise our children in a vacuum...I personally do not think it is healthy.

I think kids should have an understanding of life, the way it is lived. They should understand the in and out...how to cook, clean, sew, do laundary, how to use money, etc. I also think the should be able to use a computer and operate a telephone. They should be able to change a tire and know when a car needs gas. I think other things are cool like gardening or taking care of animals, making crafts or scrapbooking...I can not possibly teach my children everything they need to know.

I also think kids should be taught the bible, should do devotions and know how to pray and sit through a church service (once they are old enough-4 I think is a good age to start). I think they should be taught biblical morality...whatever way it should be taught.

I think kids should learn how to eat healthy. I think parents should make an effort to feed children appropriately...making sure they get fruits and veggies and protein and milk. I think it is a shame that processed unhealthy food is cheaper and lasts longer than the real thing. We use alot of processed foods I gues like hot dogs and mac and cheese and frozen pizza and then I supplement with the fresh stuff. I think it is completely impractical to think that people should buy local only because it conserves energy or buy organic because it...welll I do not know what that supposedly does. It is too EXPENSIVE! I am not going to buy tofu or some weird protein source because cows and pigs are killed the way they are. There are a lot of people in the world to feed and the way they kill animals for our needs is necessary. I do not think we should terrify our children by telling them horrible stories about where their hamburger came from. I think if people decide to be vegans or pescaterians or whatever it is fine but I do not feel like others should be scrutinized because they choose to feed their children beef of let their kids eat frozen pizza. Most of us grew up on non-organic food and hamburgers and turned out fine. YES we should eat better, yes we should support local farmers, yes we should do a lot of things, but I can not do it all. I do not have the time, energy or money. Sometimes I need to stop by McDonalds and sometimes I need something quick to fix for dinner, does that make me a bad mom?

A word about TV...I love to watch TV...at the end of a long day I like to watch my favorite show, I confess. I do not like my kids to watch TV, but I allow them some TV time. The get about 2 hours a day...most days less...some days more. They basically only watch noggin-which has actually taught my 5 year old spanish. Because it is educatoinal and there are very few commercials I let them watch it. My oldest daughter gets to watch about 2 hours of Hanna Montana a week-she loves it. They do play Vsmile and Leapster a few hours a week-if that. The rest of the time they are drawing, playing outside or playing with each other, reading books, etc.

I do not think that I am a bad mom because of any of these things. I think I am doing the best with what God has given me. I think I am teaching my children the right values and how to use their brains and talents. I enjoy spending time with them...I do not want to spend that time making my house spotless or spending all day in the kitchen cooking meals from scratch and keep them in the house like a bunch of recluses because I am afraid I will have to stop at a fast food place.

Well I guess I am done ranting for the night. When all is said and done I think I am doing a pretty good job!

What a pain!

Well, it has not been a good time for me. I am still having so much pain. I am on 5 new medications, 3 of them pain killers and I seem to get no relief...on a positive note, I do sleep well now=) The doctors have not figured out what is causing me so much pain in my leg but I am going to have an MRI in the near future...yet again. I think I have been on more medications this year than I have in my whole life. I guess I should be thankful that until recently none of my problems have involved pain. My heart truly goes out to all of those chronic pain patients who never seem to get a handle on their pain.

At least the kids are doing better. Elijah is all healed from his surgery and most of them are over their illnesses...of course just in time for a new batch of the cold virus. Just as one thing seems to clear up another always seems to fill in the gap. Now William is getting ready to go through all of his testing for autism. He scored in the mildly autistic range on the test so onto bigger and better things...right! Nathaniel is going to have his lymphnode checked out by a surgeon and Caity is being evaluated for a trial of medication for her ADD...not to mention Isabella constantly being in the category of "well she may need that feeding tube, but lets wait another 3 months." Otherwise the kids are great!! Active as ever and keeping mommy busy.

We are going to have a DVD system installed in the van so that I can keep the kids occupied since they are having to spend increasingly numerous hours in the van with Jonathan now at work most of the day and evening. Between soccer, cheerleading, baseball, dance, music class and church...we are in the van ALOT!

I have also finally decided on my homeschool carriculum-well almost all of it. We are going to do My Father's World for care and then Math-U-See, sign language and Spanish. English will be me...some reading and grammer for Caity and some phonics for William and Nathaniel. Until I find something better I think the reading is the most important thing. Next year is quickly approaching as I begin organizing my supplies. I am probably going to start in the summer, just to ease the transition and gradually build up to full time by the fall.

I am soooo ready for spring...the kids are driving me mad not being able to go outside. I want to go to the zoo and the park and all that great stuff. Of course with warmer weather also comes more frequent relapses and that I am not looking forward to.

WOW, what a week!!

This has been a very difficult week for the Lewis clan. Jonathan has started his new job full time now, he is gone most of the day and does not get home until after the children are in bed. I hate that he misses that time with them. It is also the busiest time of the day for me. All the kids are cranky and I am trying to get dinner done, baths etc.. It usually becomes chaos around 4:30 and is downhill from there. He is also working Saturdays for at least the next few weeks so he is only home 1 day a week. The kids really miss him.

Elijah had surgery on Wednesday on his hand and although it went well, he had the stitches pulled out by Friday...fortunately he has not had to have the stitches replaced, yet. He had to go in the SAME day and have his follow up appointment from his last surgery 3 weeks ago. That was a bad day. We also have several children sick with the stomach virus (it goes through the house quick when you have 6 kids around spreading their germs everywhere=(). Most of them have recovered by now but I spent most of the week cleaning up poop and vomit and doing lots of laundary-it always happens in bed, right after a fresh bath an da new pair of clothes!! Elijah, as usual, is suffering the greatest. Everytime we have a family virus like this everyone gets over it in a couple of days, but for some reason Elijah always seems to be 10 times worse than everyone else. He threw up about 10 times on thursday alone and now can not get rid of the diarhea. He now has a raging yeast infection and can barely walk because he so raw. He is just pitiful=(.

In the midst of all of this Nathaniel has had some swollen lymph nodes in his neck for over 6 months. I finally took him to the doctor this week and they did some blood work which came back abnormal. They want to see him for a recheck on friday and if his blood work is still whacky they are going to send him to the surgeon to have a biopsy done to make sure it is not cancer!!

Caity has been complaining about having urinary problems and I had to take her in today to check it out. The doctor ended up swabbing her throat. She does not have a UTI, like I thought, she has STREP...STREP, she was not even complaining of a sore throat.


In addition to all the problems with the kids being sick, I was in the ER last night due to a flair up of my "unknown illness" and have been having spasms in my hip and thigh that are so bad I can not sleep and sitting is very painful. At least I got some more pain meds to help manage that.

WHEW...I am so glad weeks like this are not commonplace around here...I think I would go insane. I know God will see us through this mini health crisis just like he always does! I think there is a reason why so many large families are followers of Christ. I think without total surrender to him...parents would go INSANE>

Here is to a better week!!!

Who has time to exercise?

Well, I have been very afraid to exercise ever since I started having all of these neurological problems. My weakness, numbness and lightheadedness seems to come out of the blue. Recently I have been having lots of problems with muscle spasms. I have severe twitching constantly, but sometimes I have certain muscles (recently my right hip and thigh) that will tighten in spams for hours. I have been afraid that exercise will make them worse. Well, being a firm believer that eating well and exercise is good for EVERYONE and has always been good to me before...well when I am actually doing it...I bought an eliptical machine. I have to have something I can do at home with the kids. I am going to try and see if I can do and keep up with it. I am obviously not getting any better by getting fatter. Maybe exercise will help me spend more of my day able to stand and actually get stuff done...here's to exercise!!!

Potty time

As this wonderful new year is unfolding, I am trying to institute many new habits. One of them was keeping up with this blog...basically my online journal. So far I am not doing that hot. I am just so tired by the time I get any kind of a break that I just can not seem to do it. I know things will get better as I fall into my new routines. I did want to share (or rather write down for posterity) that Elsie (21 months) just pooped and peed in the potty!!! I know this is not a big deal to most, but she hates diapers and she begged me to take her diaper off tonight. After I did I told her she had to go sit on the potty if she was not going to put a diaper on. She DID. I went around the corner and she was sitting there, going to the bathroom...Isabella (almost 3) wont even do that. I just thought it was a great achievment for her. Well I am sure it will be short lived but I take joy in the good things when they happen.